Humans are born with a desire to please self above all else. We are naturally selfish. Watch a baby for instance. If a baby needs something there’s no peace until it’s gotten it. To my knowledge, as far these little humans are concerned, we exist to meet their needs.
It’s so serious, this selfishness of ours that I feel one of the major reasons were here one earth, is to conquer self. But that is by the way.
It’s not all the time this selfishness is wrong though. In some cases, it is the right thing to be “selfish” especially when you need to prevent your self from being ridden over.
Maybe selfish isn’t the word in that context. Maybe it is more like self love. But let me go further. I want to focus on how all these relate to pleasing others.
So you’re doing something that you like yeah, it’s not wrong in any moral sense and perhaps it’s just how you function best. But someone else comes and begins to complain about your style of doing things.
Even as far as making you feel guilty for something they feel you should have done. Remember, it’s not like you’re doing something morally wrong. They just don’t like it and want you to change to suite their style.
So what do you do? You go ahead and please them to keep everyone satisfied? Or do the “selfish” thing you know is right for you?
If you’ve been doing the first, that’s okay. I’ve been there too. But not anymore. Because I’ve realized that most of these their demands and expectations are out of their selfish interest.
Have this people for a minute decided if you were comfortable with it? If it’ll affect you negatively or positively? Why you even do what you chose to? But no, it’s what they want and when that’s done they don’t bother about the negative effects it might have on you.
Realizing this, or seeing things in this manner has helped change my attitude towards pleasing others at my own detriment.
I hope you are able to make sense out of this. And I hope more than anything else right now, that it changes your attitude towards pleasing others but God and yourself. Especially when it’s at your detriment.