Humans are born with a desire to please self above all else. We are naturally selfish. Watch a baby for instance. If a baby needs something there’s no peace until it’s gotten it. To my knowledge, as far these little humans are concerned, we exist to meet their needs. 


It’s so serious, this selfishness of ours that I feel one of the major reasons were here one earth, is to conquer self. But that is by the way. 

It’s not all the time this selfishness is wrong though. In some cases, it is the right thing to be “selfish” especially when you need to prevent your self from being ridden over.

 Maybe selfish isn’t the word in that context. Maybe it is more like self love. But let me go further. I want to focus on how all these relate to pleasing others. 

So you’re doing something that you like yeah, it’s not wrong in any moral sense and perhaps it’s just how you function best. But someone else comes and begins to complain about your style of doing things. 

Even as far as making you feel guilty for something they feel you should have done. Remember, it’s not like you’re doing something morally wrong. They just don’t like it and want you to change to suite their style. 

So what do you do? You go ahead and please them to keep everyone satisfied? Or do the “selfish” thing you know is right for you? 


If you’ve been doing the first, that’s okay. I’ve been there too. But not anymore. Because I’ve realized that most of these their demands and expectations are out of their selfish interest. 

Have this people for a minute decided if you were comfortable with it? If it’ll affect you negatively or positively? Why you even do what you chose to? But no, it’s what they want and when that’s done they don’t bother about the negative effects it might have on you. 
Realizing this, or seeing things in this manner has helped change my attitude towards pleasing others at my own detriment.

I hope you are able to make sense out of this. And I hope more than anything else right now, that it changes your attitude towards pleasing others but God and yourself. Especially when it’s at your detriment. 

Feature image source.


6 Comments Add yours

  1. Basically, to me before I do anything I place my own self interest, because most times you can’t please everyone and leave yourself to suffer

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think what you mean is putting your principles first so you don’t miss it.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. As much as our interest matters a lot. We should be careful how we handle some situations. There are sometimes when our interest would be nothing compared to the person who needs attention which might inconvenience us. I feel we must not bend any principle guiding our lives just to please someone but as long as we are following our principles it won’t hurt. Consider these scenarios; I go out with my friends and they all drink but I’ve decided not to, do I break my rules just to please them? NO. Another time I have a certain amount of money set out to get something nice for myself and all of a sudden a hungry child walks up to me, do I help? YES. I’ve inconvenienced myself, I’ve had to please that child but for a good purpose. What does this tell us? As much as selflessness matters we must be smart, have principles guiding your life which you won’t bend for any reason. Thanks for your comment Robinson and a lot of appreciation Kelechi. You’ve done a lot and I pray God continues to bless you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amen and you too! For all your support and encouragement.

      I’m grateful for your comment. I’ve Learnt form it. Whatever happens, we mustn’t bend our guiding principles.

      That should be a major key, in deciding what offers we accept and the decisions we make.

      Thank you bro!


  3. khaled says:

    just went through your blog thoroughly i must say i’m impressed,you did all this within this short period..Big ups. Ranks

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Khaled : D : D, I appreciate you taking the time to go through the blog. God bless you!


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